It takes the Holy Spirit to convict people that a virgin gave birth, a dead man rose and a man now lives as a Spirit in my heart. Help me Holy Spirit

I went on a page, i intend to grow so i'm working:

Not hard work, just exposing my mind to God's word and His amazing possibilities. Not speaking big english, i am actually expecting God to speak to me;

A virgin gave birth:

I actually believe that Mary gave birth even though she knew no man, i believe God caused the seed He put in her to begin to grow and grow a baby boy that was birthed at the right time. I believe that she brought this child forth and lived with the miracle of this son who was not conceived by man all the days of her life and knew that God did it that way because He wanted to do something special. (This is the same way i know that God has a special reason for my life, He wants to use me for His glory and He is working in me, divinity is at work in me. Divinity is not just a story in the bible; it is also God working in my life today, i choose to see His hand in my life).

A dead man rose:

I believe that Lazarus rose again (I forgot that the pharisees tried to kill Lazarus in the next chapter because people believed; not today the devil started fighting the manifestation of God). More than that, i believe that Jesus rose, unlike the rising of Lazarus that got so many people marvelling, the rising of Jesus bought me an inheritance in Christ. Jesus did not just sleep, the Holy Ghost did not lie fallow in Him. He died and then the Holy Ghost quickened his body until He came back to life. That same Holy Ghost is at work in me and in the members of my family quickening us, He is making every part of our body come alive with His creative power. He is working in our spirit, in our mind and in our hearts; these will then affect our body and work life all over us.

A man now lives as a spirit in my heart:

More than anything i am blessed to have an intimate relationship with Jesus Christ, the anointed son of God. I have been mocked for it but i bless the day i found Jesus intimately, i love my Jesus, He speaks to me and I speak back to Him and i don't care who believes or not: He is my God, He is my friend, my legal counsel, my advocate. I remember telling my friends that i learnt the presence i got the presence of God before i learnt the word of God; i kept wondering why my pastor was so determined to teach me the word of God because i knew the spirit of God because i studied the bible but i am glad i studied the bible because i could have been confused. The Holy Ghost is the most precious gift i could ever have received and i thank God for giving Him to me before i was ready or beofre i even understood anything and i value my relationship with Him, i would not have made it in my Christian walk without Him. Lord, help me spend time with you, i really do love you but i get so busy that i do not even get time to say i love you, Lord. I appreciate what you did; teach me to take advantage of having you in life and not walking around bumbling and stumbling like the people who don't have you.

I know you are with me and for me and you are working in me even through the sweats and all, i look around me and there is so much logic, help me shut everyone else out and listen to only you; i know i can't do it without you and help is not coming from anywhere else but from you when you speak to me. Everyone else is too earthly to see anything else but i expect good again.

I expect to see your wonders and be marveled by your goodness. 

Your words say you are close to me and that you speak to me in the night seasons and even in the day, help me not to trust what my eyes can see or what my ears can hear, help me trust your course because you are able to lead me into the light and i trust your word and your voice and your promptings and i receive grace to silence all the noise and attention (both negative and positive) and hear only you in Jesus name, amen.

praying...
contacting God from time to time
...when my thots are not drifting

actually need to pray from my heart
or it's not worth it

struggling to be honest in prayer
cos i'm not acting
it's not worth it

not planning to retain this position
i want to move to another
position where i can get good

feedback
not planning to be nasty or anything
wrong positioning
need to focus on what is important

not down with playing games
LORD!!!
Help me connect and retain
I need an oasis!

Talking with God again...
He loves me perfect

Got to work on discipline
Or i won't grow
I'm so lax, it is pathetic
I used to enjoy praying at 4 am

not consistent
My faith hasn't totally died
because i pray in the 5 5 mins that
doesn't seem to matter

Not ask- ask prayer o
Just talking with God like my friend
that understands me and
wants to hear everything i say

God knows!